I feel like this week completed a long journey. Something I had resisted for so long I have finally accepted. I am danielle. For so long I’ve worn this socially acceptable costume do I could pass as what everyone else classifies “normal”. The whole time fighting that what is normal for me is danielle.
Once you had me restrained, and then began adding more restraints little by little. First my arms, them securing my legs, then attaching my head to your bed, then a second restraint securing my feet until almost all movement was impossible, the message of “no escape” truly hit home. Yes, that locked piece of flesh to which you hold the key may have determined my biological sex, but my gender has always been something I’ve hidden. Mostly due to the way I was raised and the way society as a whole operates, but under your thumb I’ve had no choice but to confront that. I am female. danielle is who I truly am. There is no escape.
I really should have admitted it before now. My closet is almost solely feminine clothing when it comes to “nice” things to wear. If a complete stranger were to look at my wardrobe without knowing who purchased it, they would have to assume it was a female who acquired it. I only have a few male outfits left in total. If I were to ever go back to work in an actual office, I would have a hard time not repeating an outfit 3 times per week if I were to present masculine. If feminine you wouldn’t see the same outfit more than once every 3 weeks. danielle has taken over.
As far as chastity is concerned, I’ve been craving orgasms again. I know I could just purchase a vibrator and start having them the way a “normal” female would, but I have also become used to being dependent on you to deciding when I am permitted to have those. They seem to always be way more intense when you tease, deny, edge, deny, then finally allow one after sometimes months without. Those moments make me consider those chastity stories where the lock is filled with liquid metal and allowed to become permanent. Yes, I know that is an impossible fantasy. At some point I will need to be unlocked just so the ensuing break can make the desire to be locked grow once again, but I don’t feel that coming anytime soon.
I like knowing that I have no escape. It feels safe.
My purpose is to give my Mistress obedience and pleasure.
