Getting to come to you this week definitely released a figurative pressure valve within me. The combination of being relocked into the corset and the weather/life events keeping even an exchange of text messages from occurring had left me feeling very anxiety ridden and emotional. Learning to sleep in the corset again just added to it as I was unable to really get a full night of rest in those 2 weeks while having no one to talk to about those struggles. It was truly a mentally torturous mindfuck that I went through. The second I arrived at your home, most of that weight went away. I would have done anything to stay all day at that point.
When you had finished securing me in your sleep sack, unable to move any part of my body except my hips when I began to strain in the cage and I heard your voice tell me you had work to do, I was immediately at peace. I know I never fell asleep, but I certainly began shifting in and out of an R.E.M dreamlike state. I couldn’t tell you what images or thoughts I had, but I could hear every sound and knew you were just nearby relaxing and possible resting yourself. I had become your perfectly stored toy that could be played with at any time if you wished. I posed no threat to anything and allowed you to have a quiet, restful afternoon with a sub instead of someone that required you to be present and vigilant. If you wanted to play, it was your choice. If you wanted to nap, you could. If you just wanted to watch me strain in my cage from time to time knowing you had conditioned me to fully trust that you would always keep me safe and simultaneously frustrated, you could.
The days following kept me in a similar state. You had locked the pink collar on for longer than you ever had before. You could now track me 24/7 through the ap on my phone. Any time I leave my apartment I am now always dressed in some sort of uniform, whether my work vest and tie dress code or appropriate femme attire. The time I spend in super casual male clothing or comfortable things is about 2% when going out. The transition from a newly locked in chastity sub to 24/7 TPE sub has been slow and almost unnoticeable, but it has all but occurred.
I now just wait anxiously for that first time I get to spent a night there with you as your personal toy. I’ve never really been an extended toy before. I know I now have the conditioning in place to be able to handle it and welcome it happily. When it occurs, I know I will whimper the same words I said through the gag this past week just after you had me totally secured and powerless…” thank You Ms Patty”
