This week I finally cleared a hurdle that you had set up for me quite a while ago. While bound, gagged, deafened, and blinded in your cage, I was finally able to release into the diaper. After what may have been 45 minutes to an hour, I felt my body cramping, but I had felt that before. Usually, it took me getting up and standing upright or walking around before my body would allow my bladder to empty, but this time there was just too much time left of my conditioning regimen to hold it in.
When I finally did release, I not only felt physically better, but had quite an emotional release as well. I knew it was something that you wanted to happen. You had tried to provoke that response before. With your instructions through the headphones telling me “your purpose is to make your Mistress happy”, I knew I had done a good thing. Not only does d the cramping subside, but every muscle in my body instantly relaxed and I went deeper into the trance than I ever had before. While your voice was repeating through the headphones, I could barely make out the words. They faded in and out. I hovered between sleep and wakefulness. I became more and more submissive.
When you let me out of the cage, I wanted nothing more than to just be told what I could do to serve you. Being given a task to do after you gave me my sight back felt like the greatest gift. It allowed me a few more minutes with you, pleasing you, before my dismissal. I truly didn’t want to leave at that point. I wanted nothing more than to be given more tasks in my wet diaper, still collared and feeling totally dazed and submissive. No part of me was even thinking about the teasing you usually do at that point. All I could feel was the weight of the steel collar and the rough interior of the punishment blouse you had me wear while in the cage.
In that mental state I stayed until I was finally allowed to remove the then soaked diaper and punishment blouse that evening at 8. At 8:10 I was asleep from mental and emotional exhaustion. I stayed asleep until 7 the next morning with no interruptions. I think it’s the most restful night of sleep I’ve had in a while.
Now that I’ve cleared that hurdle, I’m extremely excited to find out what the next step of my conditioning is with you.
